The essential key to solving disagreements is this; ask, "How can I honor, glorify and please Christ as Lord in this situation?"
The true Christian life, true spirituality, is not merely a negative not -- doing of any small list of things. Even if the list began as a very excellent list of things to beware of in that particular historic setting, we still must emphasize that the Christian life, or true spirituality, is more than refraining from a certain external list of taboos in a mechanical way. - Francis A. Schaeffer (True Spirituality)
A church will just be going about its business, then suddenly wham and crash! People are arming themselves for battle, choosing sides, and indulging in their pride. Personalities and self-determination take control of the situation and seek their own over sound reasoning, the truth, and call of our Lord. So, arguments of persuasion with the skewing of truth produce self-directed outcomes, which come against the peaceful church. And, its peace is no longer; full-blown war has broken out. An effective leader is on the watch and will act fast to solve and prevent conflict.
We Have to Realize We Will Have Conflict. We will come across various disagreements, misunderstandings, and distinctions with various views of moral and value stands with one another that will converge in our relationships.
How to deal with conflict in a nutshell! This is a basic step by step biblical process to solve conflict personally or in a church. Most problems seem complex; intertwined with so many people and so much hurt and communication ills, they seem overwhelming and hopeless. But, that is not the case; most problems have just a few simple components to them that can be isolated and dealt with.
Our human nature loves to be in competition and fights, but God has a higher call for us. James takes us directly to the root cause of fights, quarrels, wars, and conflicts; they all come from one source, and that is the conflict that resides in our own hearts!
Do You Attack Others to Cover Yourself? Are you more likely to trust people first until proven wrong or do you start by distrusting others until they prove themselves as trustworthy? What does Christ want us to do?
Do you fear Conflict? Yes conflict management is a hard act to do, and my least favorite job in the church, but it is a necessity for a healthy church. So to avoid the conflict in the first place is to have a Biblical plan to resolve it.
There are three main categories of conflict, Interpersonal Conflict, Intrapersonal Conflict and Substantive Conflict.
Do you know that you are an ambassador of Christ? We are to take seriously the call to be responsible for each other in love and care. When we help each other, even in the midst of conflict, to point out sin and wrong doing, we are...
The following is a biblical model to confront someone on the basis of sin and/or wrong doing, or to handle disagreeable rifts in the body.
If it is your desire to destroy and split a church, then simply have no plan to resolve staff disputes. Satan will just love you and your members will be disillusioned and spread bitterness and spiritual distraction to others.
True wisdom will solve any conflict! We, as mature Christian leaders, need to see the distinction of God's providence working in the lives of His people, and the pettiness of our actions. God is in control and He will win, no matter what we do.
A lot of people are unreasonable—even Christians. We will run into people who will just not get it; they will not listen, deal, resolve, or handle things God's way.
Conflict is almost always necessary when the forces of darkness encroach upon the Christian Life. It is necessary to stand up for the rights of the unborn. It is necessary to fight for morals and values in our schools and government. It is necessary to not yield to Satan and our evil desires. For, if we do not take a stand, our fall will be close at hand.
Here is a plan to prevent conflict from happening and when it does, you can solve it quickly! How can we restrain our desires to manipulate, control, and to be aggressive, and repair relationships instead?
One of the clearest evidences of being a mature Christian is an increased awareness and knowledge of the need to be in Christ, and not to be to ourselves.
Keys to Solving Conflict:
- Realize and commit to our Lord and honor Him. We do this by operating in godly character and bringing Christ into the situation (1 Cor. 10:31)!
- Examine yourself to make sure you did not offend. And, if so, be open, honest, and seek forgiveness and reconciliation (Matt. 7:5).
- Ask in prayer, Lord, how can I show You and Your precepts in this situation (Matt. 5:24)?
- Be committed to restore relationships with grace, forgiveness, and love (Gal. 6:1).